My son asked why I always put his backpack by the door the night before but we still leave late

Told him the backpack's ready. The lunch is packed. His shoes are paired.

What's *not* ready is him remembering he needs a poster board, a signed permission slip, and "a costume that represents a historical figure" — all mentioned at 7:53 a.m.

Punchline

The backpack's on time. We're just *historically* late.